A new beginning

I can’t believe just a day ago we were saying goodbye to 2018; tying up loose ends, writing down resolutions.

I can’t believe just a night back I was staring out the window, counting down the last few seconds of 2018 left on the clock.

I can’t believe I’ve been given this chance to start all over again. Really, I just can’t believe it.

It all feels like it happened too fast, too sudden, like a train smash- but it didn’t. It was a slow and gradual process, like a crescendo it built up until it got to today and for that I’m grateful. I’m grateful because it gave me the chance to reflect, evaluate and learn. It gave me the chance to know what changes I had to make and where I had to make them. So here I am now on the 2nd of January, 2019, announcing to the world that I’m finally ready for change, because I know what has to be changed.

I know that I have to change the tendency of doubting myself, hating myself, crying myself to sleep at night. I know that now more than I ever, I need to love myself because no one will ever love me the way that I can- the way that God can. So this year I’ll put myself first, I’ll love myself first, I’ll care for myself first until there’s no room for doubt. So I ask that you let me be held accountable to you, for the weight I want to lose, the love for self I want to gain, and all the goals I have for this year.

Anyways, I think it’s time for me to introduce myself: My name is Mengeti Dlamini, and this is my journey to simply becoming.